did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
