It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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