as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Randomize
