yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
