i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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