We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
