weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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