I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
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