Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
