Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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