At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
