I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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