So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Need sex. Gaining weight.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize