He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize