D3 body, D1 cock
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
i think i have two assholes
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
