Its about making memories worth repressing
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
