I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
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