i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
