hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
