Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
