brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you donโt have to recycle anymore ๐๐
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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