How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
