I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Randomize
