I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Randomize
