Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Randomize
