Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize