Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
