He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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