I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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