You don't have asthma, your pregnant
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
