i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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