I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize