Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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