how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
