this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
This house was built for laser tag.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
