oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
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