Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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