He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
