clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
