Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
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