the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
