there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
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