My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
