you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
