Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
