doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Can Purell be used as lube?
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Randomize
