I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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