9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
