make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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