But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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